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Racquetball
Skill Rating
D-players.
Beginners. Can find the racquetball courts if
there are proper signs. Sometimes wear swim fins on the court. Never bring a
can of balls with them. Often leave blood on the court.
C-Players.
Intermediate. Own their own racquets. Never bring
a new can of balls with them. Been using the same ball since 1995. A squash
ball bounces higher than this ball does. Knows many of the rules. Follows
some of them. Plays in running shoes. Still waiting to break a sweat.
B-Players.
Advanced Intermediate. Owns two racquets: One
Oversized, and one Ektelon CBK last restrung in 1987. Brings both to the
courts. Has a copy of the 1994 AARA rule book in the bag. Uses it. Think
they're A-players. Always has a fresh ball.
A-Players.
Twenty-three gloves hanging from bag. Changes
gloves between shots. "If I hit you its an avoidable. If you hit me it's
not. Simple. Read the rule book." Never brings new balls. Expects the
B-players to provide them.
Open players.
Screams at referee. Screams at opponent. Screams
at linesman. Screams at self. Screams at tournament director. Screams at
kids. Screams at spectators. Screams at Mother Theresa.
Source: meetandplay.com/alt.sport.racquetball newsgroup.
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